10 Unwritten Rules of Boating Everyone Should Know
Updated: Sep 21
Nobody hands you a handbook when you step onto somebody's boat.
Maybe they should.
Because while there are plenty of actual boating laws and safety rules you need to follow, there's another set of rules you'll probably never find posted at the marina.
The unwritten rules of boating.
You know the ones.
Don't show up empty-handed.
Don't complain about the music if you didn't bring the boat.
And whatever you do...
Do NOT stand there criticizing the captain while they're trying to dock.
Whether you're the captain, the Passenger Princess or that friend who somehow manages to arrive every weekend without bringing a single thing, here are the 10 unwritten rules of boating everyone should know.
Don't Show Up Empty-Handed
You received the sacred invitation:
"We're taking the boat out Saturday. Wanna come?"
Excellent.
Now bring something.
Drinks.
Ice.
Snacks.
Water.
A bag of chips.
Literally anything that indicates you understand boats do not magically stock themselves overnight.
The captain already supplied the boat, fuel, maintenance, insurance and approximately 47 other things you probably don't want to know the price of.
You can bring the ice.
BoatDaddy Rule:
If you arrive empty-handed, you'd better arrie with an exceptional personality.
Preferably both.
The Captain Gets Final Say
Every boat needs somebody ultimately responsible for what's happening.
That's the captain.
If the captain says it's time to head in because weather is moving in, you head in.
If the captain tells you where the life jackets are, pay attention.
If the captain asks everyone to sit down whie docking, sit down.
And if BoatDaddy says:
"We're leaving the lake at 5:00."
Well...
That's different.
We all know that means somewhere around 8:47.
But when it comes to safety and operating the boat, the captain gets the final say.
Never Criticize the Docking Unless You're Willing to Take Over
There are few moments in life more humbling than docking a boat with an audience.
Suddenly everyone becomes an expert.
"You need to turn!"
"OTHER WAY!"
"You're coming in too fast!"
"Watch the dock!"
Thank you, Susan.
Very helpful.
Unless the captain specifically asks for assistance, your responsibilities are fairly simple:
Grab the line when asked.
Keep your hands and feet where they belong.
And resist the overwhelming urge to provide live commentary.
BoatDaddy Rule:
If you're going to critique the docking, congratulations - you just volunteered to dock next time.
Respect the Boat
This sounds obvious.
Apparently it isn't.
Treat somebody else's boat like you'd want them to treat yours.
Don't grind muddy shoes into the seats.
Don't throw trash everywhere.
Don't slam compartments.
Don't leave sticky drinks sitting where they're guaranteed to spill.
And please don't discover some mysterious new way to break something that the boat owner didn't even realize could break.
Boats are expensive.
Boat owners know this.
We think about it constantly.
Help With the Lines
There are two types of boat passengers.
The first sees the boat approaching the dock and asks:
"Need me to grad a line?"
The second remains comfortably seated while watching the captain perform a one-person Cirque du Soleil routine between the helm, dock and ropes.
Be Passenger #1.
You don't need to be an experienced deckhand.
Listen to instructions, grab the line you're asked to grab and help when you can.
You'll immediately move several positions higher on the People Who Get Invited Back list.
Don't Touch the Music Unless You've Earned DJ Privileges
Music can make or break a boat day.
Therefore, control of the playlist is a responsibility that should not be taken lightly.
You don't simply walk onto someone else's boat, connect your phone and announce:
"I've got the perfect playlist."
That's how trust gets broken.
Boat music requires balance.
Something everybody knows.
Something somebody can sing badly.
Something that makes the entire boat yell:
"OHH< THIS IS MY SONG!"
And absolutely no 17-minute experimental jazz solos unless the entire boat has agreed to it beforehand.
BoatDaddy Rule:
The captain controls the boat. The approved DJ controls the vibes.
👕 Don't Forget the Lake-Day Uniform
You've got the cooler.
You've got the sunscreen.
You've got the playlist.
Now there's only one question:
What are you wearing?
Boat days aren't exactly formal occasions—which is precisely why they're great.
Throw on something comfortable, grab your favorite hat and wear something that lets everyone know you'd rather be on the water.
Whether you're the captain, the Passenger Princess, the unofficial cooler manager or the person contributing absolutely nothing except good vibes, there's a place for you aboard.
And probably a BoatDaddy shirt for it.
What Happens at the Sandbar...
...will probably end up in somebody's camera roll.
So perhaps the old saying needs updating.
What happens at the sandbar should probably stay at the sandbar. but check who's filming first.
Have fun.
Meet people.
Float around.
Dance badly.
Make memories.
But remember that there's a difference between a good lake story and a story that begins:
"So then the conservation officer walked over..."
Make questionable decisions responsibly.
Don't Be the Person Who Complains About Everything
The water's cold.
The sun's hot.
The music's loud.
The boat's moving too fast.
The boat's moving too slow.
You're hungry.
You're tired.
You want to go back.
You don't want to go back.
At some point, we need to discuss why you agreed to come boating.
Boat days aren't always perfect.
Sometimes the weather changes.
sometimes the restaurant has a wait.
Sometimes somebody forgets something.
Sometimes the captain attempts to dock three times while pretending that was the plan all along.
Roll with it.
BoatDaddy Rule:
Good vibes take up very little cooler space. Bring plenty.
9. Help Clean Up
You know what's considerably less fun than spending eight hours on the lake?
Cleaning up after eight people who spend eight hours on the lake.
When the boat gets back to the dock, don't perform the Great Passenger Disappearing Act.
Grab the trash.
Empty the cooler.
Carry something.
Wipe something down.
Ask what needs to be done.
Five minutes of everybody helping can save the boat owner a whole lot of work.
And there's another benefit:
People who help clean the boat tend to get invited back onto the boat.
Coincidence?
BoatDaddy thinks not.
Never Ask How Much the Boat Costs
You may be curious.
Don't.
Because the answer isn't simply the purchase price.
There's fuel.
Insurance.
Storage.
Maintenance.
Repairs.
Accessories.
Dock fees.
Winterization.
Upgrades.
And approximately 376 purchases that began with:
"You know what would be cool for the boat?"
Boat ownership works bet when we don't add everything together.
BoatDaddy Rule:
We Don't calculate the total.
We simply enjoy the boat.
This principle is important for everyone's emotional well-being.
BONUS RULE: Don't Make the Captain Regret Inviting You
This is really what all the unwritten rules of boating boil down to.
Be helpful.
Be respectful.
Bring something.
Don't create unnecessary drama.
Listen when safety is involved.
Clean up after yourself.
And contribute to the good time.
You don't have to know anything about boats to be a great boat guest.
You just have to be someone people want to spend another Saturday with.
Because the highest honor in lake life isn't getting invited onto the boat once.
It's receiving this text the following weekend:
"We're heading out again. You in?"
That's when you know you've made it.
🚤 The Official BoatDaddy Unwritten Rules
Need the short version?
Don't show up empty-handed
Captain gets final say
Don't criticize the docking
Respect the boat
Help wth the lines
Don't hijack the playlist
Keep questionable decisions reasonably responsible
Bring good vibes
Help clean up
Never calculate what boating actually costs
And perhaps the most important rule:
Don't be the reason a new rule has to be created.
Every lake crew has that one rule.
And every one of those rules has an origin story.
What's Your Boat's Unwritten Rule?
Now we want to hear yours.
Every captain and lake crew ha at least one rule that outsiders don't know about.
Maybe nobody touches the playlist.
Maybe whoever finishes the ice has to buy the next bag.
Maybe certain people have permanently lost docking privilege.
Or perhaps your rule exists because of The Incident of 2024 that nobody is allowed to discuss.
Whatever it is...
What's the #1 unwritten rule on YOUR boat?
Share it with BoatDaddy on Facebook or Instagram.
And yes...
Wrong answers are highly encouraged.
Life's better on the water.
-BoatDaddy
Captain of Good Times
BoatDaddy Designs
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